Friday, April 13, 2007

 

Haiku Friday is BACK!



Good Friday seemed like it needed a bit of haitus-- but now the Razor is back, bringing the haiku. Post 'em below, in the pattern of 5 syllables/7 syllables/5 syllables. Here are some suggested topics:

1) Karaoke with Mom
2) Minitrial debacle!
3) My favorite Easter tradition
4) Finals
5) Cold fusion in a jar.

Here's mine:

I sit in the back,
And watch it all fall apart;
We'll build it back.

Comments:
We've been pounding beers;
I think I know how it ends.
Oh, God... not again!
 
Vodka, in this case
Orange Juice and some vodka
Small amounts of juice
 
I have a bad cold.
So does Bill. Spencer is fine.
No Preschool Fridays.

Take turns parenting.
Child is full of energy.
Your turn to be sick.

I wish I could use
suspended animation
just for today.

Spencer frozen in
a pod like in Spinal Tap.
Thaw him after lunch.

Not Spinal Tap. Some
other movie, Duh. I hate
Science Fiction. Yuck.

He will wake up soon
Like he has been shot out of
a cannon. "MOMMY!!!!!!"

Wipe up spills, step on
talking Elmo, legos, blocks,
robots, little cars.

Hurricane Spencer
NOW what's he into? Jeep? Bike?
Someone's guitar? Yikes.

I woke up to sneeze.
Going back to bed now. Catch
you on the flip side.
 
still repeating pics
not for lack of pics either
just cause it's osler
 
Osler's best planning,
Like the plans of mice and men,
Goes awry in PC.
 
Turn off the Bigot!
Ho, ho, ho, Merry Imus?
Time for a nappy.
 
Celebrity Luvr--
Nappies are for astronauts
Not for talk radio.
 
another SNAFU
our happy Booker answer
not "no;" sly "yes, but . . ."
 
Hey there Ms. Squeeky!
I used the pix you sent--
Now I'm out again.
 
The Law is noble.
Practice Court is fertile dirt.
The Student, a Flower.
 
Osler needs photos
Though I love my old Plymouth
He could use new pics
 
The witness reviews notes.
Still has not responded to
"Do you love your wife?"
 
I sit in the chair
no! Don't ask me that question!
fine. your funeral....

I am always torn
I don't want to hurt your grade
but you need tough love...
 
Good stuff, Stokes...
 
Oh Mini-Trials!
We had a judge physically
throw the book at us
 
Graduation nears.
Time goes slower yet faster.
So hard to focus!
 
Osler, I sent you
many pictures of Spencer
Are you TODDLERIST??

Toddlers are people
too, only smaller, louder.
And they wear their food.

Osler do not be
hatin'. Show some luv to the
tiny ones. Peace and out.
 
Osler was your Haiku about your class? or the razor?
 
Mom sings songs off-key
Would that she'd not sing to me
Tom Jones' "Delilah".
 
Classmate on the tube
Are you kidding me? Really?
Oh she got kicked off!
 
Drinks on Sunday night
Only if outlines are done
A reason to write!

Three jobs this summer
Who said I had common sense?
Less playtime than school.
 
Opera is fun,
Except when you crack high notes.
Then it really sucks.

But one thing I know
Is, at the end of the day,
My kids will love me.

So I do not care
About that stupid high C
The composer wrote.

He's an idiot
Who does not know anything
Of vocal technique.

My best memory
Was when my dad said to me,
"That girl got applause."

He's a funny guy
Who used to travel quite far
To her his son sing.

Another time he said,
At DER ROSENKAVALIER:
"That was too damned long!"

Which was humorous
Because my role had ended
Three hours 'ere curtain!
 
Up two balconies
Way in the back with the poor
I still hear it all.
 
Minitrials are done!
Everyone races out
To go have beer n' sex.
 
Wasted good cross-x
did not prep my witness well
hitting head on wall
 
Tom--

So, on the bright side
I probably won't blog
About that one bad thing.
 
Y'all have had a week
To remember. Just know that
It was worth no sleep.

I'm writing haiku
On a Swiss train from Milan
Thinking of y'all--done.

My holiday's done;
No billable hours, my job--
The clothes I just bought

Wish I could bill hours.
Those store windows beckoned hard
I thought sure they'd fit--

Italians are THIN.
Reality check. Yet they
Talk FOOD constantly.

I don't get it. But
Nice ladies, laughing, found me
Clothes that fit. Shoes, too.
 
I want to be Swiss
And really thin, and go to
Italy tonight.
 
Tydwbleach, for you:
Take the kid to the mall now
Then just drive back home.
 
Students celebrate
Commencement. Coworkers mourn
Friendships rent by “bye.”
 
Tears from the losers
like melting snows from Fuji
give profs shaudenfraude.
 
Can't leave kid at mall.
Tried that already. He found
way back. Goldfish trail.
 
Expert for Hearing
Disappears.. had heart attack
Now what? Extension?
 
How did I miss this?
Haiku Friday with Cretins?
Needs more Puffalumps.
 
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