Sunday, January 28, 2007

 

No wonder my syllabus gets all messed up...




My calendar is defective! Seriously, people, how much proofreading does it take to get a friggin' calendar correct? I'm assuming this is done by professionals, albeit (apparently) professionals who drink on the job.

The whole debacle recalls the terrible day in class three or four years ago when I attempted to explain how to count days for filing purposes-- long story short, it would seem that if I created a calendar, it would look kind of like this one.

Comments:
The strange thing is, it seems the 1 & 3 were having a little fight.

Since numbers generally don't have personal feuds I'm thinking the calendar creator was stoned.

During his state of chemical euphoria he decided the number 1 and 3 were dating on and off seeing each other one or two times a month. Things were going great till the end of May. The 1 came along to meet up with the 3 and caught him cheating with the 0.

She waited till October for her revenge, leaving him high, dry and lonely.

Both realizing the nature of their relationship have now mended ways and are working things out.

If this was a soap opera I'd predict, the whorish 3 cheating 1 with the 2 next year but this isn't a soap opera . . . it's just a calendar.

So I'm going back to studying now.
 
I guess that would explain why KWTX gets the news wrong - their calendar is defective.
 
Ok, fess up people...how many of you couldn't figure out what all the defects were on your own and came to the comment section to find out?
 
Osler:

You should start a new tradition. Like "Haiku Friday," you can now start (based on this entry's comments) . . .

- Finals Fodder
- Sleep-deprived Depravity
- Cramming Cuckoo
- Boredom Banter
- What?
- Huh?
 
I COULD NOT SEE ANYTHING wrong with the calendars either!!!! I admit it.
 
OK OK I see it now.... Did you buy this calendar at SUCCESSORIES????

No wonder they are out of business.
 
I recommend you take deem any extra days in the syllabus "Puffalump Day."

One long nap as a break from finals.
 
So ANYway, the only reason the dates are all screwy is because they are non profit. Seriously, if you want a calender that works, shell out some money for one....No offense.
 
I was in the infamous "counting days" class a few years ago, as was on of my fellow associates. Every time a question arises regarding deadlines, one of us is guaranteed to look at the other and say "...and 1."
 
I personally know the man who created these calendars. He once spent an summer interning for the BearMeat Editorial Board. Sadly, his nonlinear conception of time absolutely ruined the planning for our Y2K Party, which he scheduled for January 11th, 2002.

When we queried him about this "little" slip-up and asked him if he and his buddies had been drinking, he replied, "Waco We Do," which we believe is the first utterance of the phrase. He meant to convey that the whole city prides itself on mediocrity and intoxication.
 
I personally know the man who created these calendars. He once spent an summer interning for the BearMeat Editorial Board. Sadly, his nonlinear conception of time absolutely ruined the planning for our Y2K Party, which he scheduled for January 11th, 2002.

When we queried him about this "little" slip-up and asked him if he and his buddies had been drinking, he replied, "Waco We Do," which we believe is the first utterance of the phrase. He meant to convey that the whole city prides itself on mediocrity and intoxication.
 
Hey at least Osler buys American, unlike some you other Pinko Commies that buy your calendars overseas...

As for the use of this calendar.. COME ON... does anyone use those desk pad calendars as a REAL calendar??? You know you are just gonna doodle on it while on the phone... so doodle in the correct dates while you're at it and PRESTO!
 
I too, was in the infamous counting class. Kinda hard to explain it, but it seems Osler, rather than counting actual days someone spent in jail, was counting the the the little lines between the days. In short he would end up with an extra day each time he counted.
I bet there is somone sitting in Federal prison up in Detroit who isn't supposed to be there. I bet the Innocence Project should get on that one. Maybe an enterprising young law student can help set someone free because Olser filed his motion a day late?!
It's even more disturbing that he's using calendars like these.
Wonder if he always has an extra day of lecture too?
 
No offense to Brian McKinney, but just because a calendar is non profit doesn't give them an excuse to screw up something as easy as the right dates. If you're going to make the effort to produce a calendar, you might as well do it right (and spend 20 seconds to check for any errors), otherwise you look silly. My brothers and I made calendars all the time for grandparents for Christmas when we were kids. We never got paid...yet all our dates were perfect. If a 3, 7, and 9 year old can get it right, I think the news should too.
 
I've always wanted to be able to relive particular days of my life, both ones where I screwed up... in hopes I could undo the damage... and the ones that were fabulous so I could do them again.

Looks like I'll be able to relive October 3 this year. Not quite sure whether it will be a day of screwing up or if it will be fabulous, but I know that I should push the envelope that day, as I will get a second chance to relive it or undo the damage.
 
Try to make May 30 extra-special, too, since that one will go around again...

And I think I only added one extra day, rather than doubling the number of days...
 
No, I'll just sleep in on the second May 30. Clients would object if I charged them twice for work done on the same day.
 
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