Wednesday, October 04, 2006

 

Fashion Night Recap #2: Business Casual For Guys



For many guys, business casual is a tough concept. Khakis aren't nice enough, but a suit is too much. How to finesse this fashion conundrum?

Remember the two cardinal rules: You want to (1) Err on the side of being conservative, and (2) Err on the side of being overdressed. There is nothing worse than a business casual male who is not wearing enough clothes. To remedy this problem, take a tip from Vice-President of the United States, Dick Cheney. Pictured above, he is shown wearing business casual garb to a government event. Note that he has left nothing to chance-- every bit of him is covered with several layers of cloth, including his head. While some might think that this look is not practical for the typical Texas summer, there are sacrifices one must make to avoid being the subject of ridicule by "showing too much skin." No one is getting a look at Mr. Cheney's undergarments today!

In short, the male attorney does not have the option, as do women, of wearing the full burqa. By adopting the boots/thermal socks/underoos/long underwear/pants/leggings/gaiters/turtleneck/undershirt/sweater/parka/muffler/watchcap look, the stylish yet appropriate man can project the right image in his own, more masculine, way.

Comments:
Wow. The mere mention of Cheney is enough to put me in a bad mood, but the mention of Cheney's underwear... first thing in the morning... has ruined my entire day. Thanks.
 
Cheney is a moron.
 
Every time I see that picture I laugh. Thanks. I needed a good laugh today.
 
Ah, you miss the point. Although conservative wear may often seem like the best choice, and although its also important to "fit in," these rules are more important if you're a junior associate or a freshman member of Congress. Sometimes you need to stand out from the crowd. You don't want to seem like a generic brand. That's why consumer products companies are always trying to invent new colors like "puce" or "ecru." Madison Ave. still can't believe Americans bought into the whole "teal" thing. Everyone knows "teal" is just the crayola color "aquamarine" with a new name.

Same with lawyers, business people and politicians. A bright tie or a suit with a modern cut will get attention.

And it works in your personal life too... As that great philosopher ZZ Top once said, "Every Girl's Crazy 'Bout a Sharp Dressed Man!"

Anyhow, here, in this photo, the Vice President wanted to stand out and let people know he was a fashion forward kind of guy. If you're going to attend a state funeral or some other event where you want to let the world (and in this case I am not speaking metaphorically) that you were there, wearing ridiculously inappropriate garments will do the trick. Not sure about whether he actually needs undergarments ..
 
I can't help but ask (being a native Texan), if it is even worth going you have to put that much clothes on? I don't see any point in freezing my ass off!
 
Good points, Person of IPLaw. You know... I never bought into that whole "teal" thing.
 
My favorite touch is the ski area pass attached to the zipper of the parka.
 
Dick Cheney is an exhibitionist! He's showing so much skin in that photo it looks like a Playboy spread. Cheney should take fashion advice from his friend Darth Vader -- cover your face. (I know the Vader and Cheney talk, because their ideas on criminal and civil justice are identical).

More young associates should take the time to cover their face. Why do they think we want to see their ugly mugs?

The creative associate can still find versatility in face covering. He can wear a bandana 'round his face on "casual" Friday. Then a skimask for the deposition. Perhaps a phantom of the opera mask for a court hearing. Anyway, you get the point.

So quit encouraging these associates to show their skin. You and Hugh Hefner and ruining America!
 
That's no ski area pass! Say what you want about our Vice President, but don't say he shows up at important events like automobile dealer openings, state funerals or Republican fundraisers without prepared remarks!

Here, VP Cheney had the foresight to know that due to snow and ice, the teleprompter might not work. Other members of the administration might carry electronic communications devices so that Karl Rove can tell them what to say, but not the Veep! He's a free thinker.

No, that little attachment to his zipper is actually a backup copy of his canned "dead foreign leader-- cold climate version" speech.
 
Unfortunately, it wasn't a dead leader that he was there for, rather it was the death of untold millions at Auschwitz. Gotta give it to the classy guy though, not wearing black like everyone around him set him apart from the crowd. I'm sure y'all covered this in the Fashion night, but you want to stand out! At commemorations such as the 50 year liberation of Auchwitz you need to make sure you are the center of attention. Much like a firm function where you have to stand out!
 
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