Tuesday, July 08, 2008


Help me pick my name!

It's getting to the point where they are designing the cover of my book. One thing I am thinking about is how I should have my name appear on the cover. My full name is Mark William Osler, and that's how it appears on SSRN, for example. However, I usually think that sounds too pretentious, and just write under the name "Mark Osler," skipping the whole middle name altogether.

In this situation, the full name might have some advantages. I'm middle-named after a famous medical researcher, Sir William Osler. If I use the full name, it might seem vaguely familiar to some people. Still, I identify three names with two kinds of people-- criminal defendants and pretentious blowhards. I hope to be neither.

On the other hand, that Sir William Osler had a wicked sense of humor.

So, which way should I jump?

Since your middle name is not "Wayne," you are safe from becoming a criminal. Pretense isn't usually indicated by the addition of the middle name, but rather by appellations such as Esq., III, or His Royal Eminence. However, you could go with the slightly ironic-yet-kitschy first initial, full middle name setup favored by bad science fiction authors cum cult leaders and the wonderful man who gave us the Oz stories.
Or T. Larry Bates.
I say go big or go home.


His Royal Eminence, Gordon Elliott Davenport III, Esq.
As long as the cover features you in a bodice-ripping scene, you can call yourself whatever you want.
Mark Justice Osler
Mark Danger Osler
Is it true that the "T" in Bates' name is for Trouble?
I say jump in the middle:

Mark W. Osler

It maintains a sense of dignity without being pretentious.
M-Dub Osler.

Mark "No more Big Willy, my game is grown, prefer you call me William" Osler.

Mark "100 Dollar BILL" Osler (Bill, taken from William, of course)


Mark "I Sling Justice Like Dope" Osler.

M. Diddy

The problem with that is that I lose the vaguely familiar "William Osler" thing. I say the middle name is all in or all out.

Or I could go to Mark Craig Osler or Larry Craig Osler, but I'm not sure I want to be vaguely familiar in that way...

[sorry, that dude kind of ruined the reputation of both the name "Craig" and the Minneapolis airport.
Mark MO Money Osler
Mark 8 Mile Osler

Where I'm from, it would be Mark ("Vernier Road") Osler. I have no idea why they call 8 mile that down there...
G.M. Osler
You just had to go there, huh? Not all of us can share a name with a knighted physician.

My second choice is Mark William Osler.
I vote for Mark Big Willie Styles Ossdigglesworth

However, if you want to go simple, I vote for no middle name. Every lawyer uses their middle name and I find it pretentious. That ain't you man. You're Mark Osler, man of tremendous argumentation and research and devoid of pretentiousness.
Mark Osler.

It'll match with how they introduce you on the Today Show--or the Daily Show. Can you imagine Matt Lauer or Jon Stewart having to say, And our next guest, the author of . . . , is Mark William Osler?

Barkus Featherstone Osler

Coincidence that your namesake was a great teacher?

Actually I agree with Swissgirl on the name thing.
I do not know about your name but you should really think about using one of your Dad's paintings on the cover. Are you gonna?
yeah or at least make sure there is a rendering of you and Fabio on a horse.
Who is "Fabio?"
Ok What about Mark W. Osler?


Mark "MaBozz" Osler

Mark "I hate GM" Osler

Mark "Epiphanitious" Osler

And then put yourself on the cover in a backwards cap and a huge platinum SCALES OF JUSTICE necklace, with your arms crossed. Kinda like Mr. T.

PS Epiphanitious might not be a real word.....
WHO is FABIO?????

FABIO ... that goof male model who is in the I Can't believe it isn't butter ads and on the cover of every romance novel...

And you call yourself a lawyer...
Osler, are you just mad that I made fun of Gordon Lightfoot?
Here are my ideas:

Mark Aroni Osler
M. Murder Osler
Osler William Osler
Egerton Yorrick Davis
I'm with Swissgirl. If you promote the book, you will be "Mark Osler."

I was leaning to Mark W. Osler, seeing as we share a middle initial, but she's right.

As for trying to trade of the reputation of William Osler, that could be actionable under unfair competition law... or would be if he was still alive or only recently dead.

Love the Fabio idea too. Ever since he got his in the face by a duck at Busch Gardens in Williamsburg I've been a fan.
How 'bout M. William Osler. There just something prestigious about having the initial for the fist name, plus you would keep the William Osler that might be recognizable (though, I must admit, I don't recognize the name).
I say make it Mark William Osler but have everyone one pronounce the "W" like a "V"
Is that a painting of Stalin?
I think you should use some sort of made-up hieroglyphic, a la Prince.

Mrs. CL
Osler The Ozlerian
I say you go with something elegant and professional, like MC Ozz and the Get Money Krew, or Sir Wilhem von Writtenbook Olser the Third, Esq.
El Marco Billiam-o de Osler-o.
M. "Oz" Osler.
Edgy, catchy, memorable, with literary allusions.
Mahatma Kane Jeeves?
Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?