Thursday, December 20, 2012
Advent quiet Thursday
This week, I'm going to feature a gentle and insighful comment that my friend and mentor Craig Anderson made a few days ago, in reaction to the story from Ron Fournier about his son:
Mark - what a touching, remarkable story. I admire your friend's candor and hard earned love for his son. A great example of how parent and child relationships are so often informed by a complex weave of differing needs, differing aspirations, and differing personalities. I had a father that loved me dearly and did his very best to love and provide for me as best as he knew how … yet our shared frustration and pains were often informed by the mismatch of what he had to offer and what I needed. As I matured (and that took time!), and as we both became wiser in this regard, we worked it out. We all love as best as we know how; as a son, coming to that understanding, helped greatly to deepen my love and my appreciation for all my father did for me. And I hope it has helped in the dance of parenthood with my own daughters … what they need is not always what I have to offer … and yet I do my best to love them as best I know how. Love your son/daughter!
Mark - what a touching, remarkable story. I admire your friend's candor and hard earned love for his son. A great example of how parent and child relationships are so often informed by a complex weave of differing needs, differing aspirations, and differing personalities. I had a father that loved me dearly and did his very best to love and provide for me as best as he knew how … yet our shared frustration and pains were often informed by the mismatch of what he had to offer and what I needed. As I matured (and that took time!), and as we both became wiser in this regard, we worked it out. We all love as best as we know how; as a son, coming to that understanding, helped greatly to deepen my love and my appreciation for all my father did for me. And I hope it has helped in the dance of parenthood with my own daughters … what they need is not always what I have to offer … and yet I do my best to love them as best I know how. Love your son/daughter!
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I love what Craig has to say and it speaks truths that many are unable to admit or in many cases identify as deal with.
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