Tuesday, December 06, 2011
It's the Razor Holiday Shopping Guide!
Every year about this time, the Razor features some great ideas for Holiday gift giving! Here are several ideas for the discriminating shopper!
1) Tires
Who doesn't love automobile tires? Everyone needs them, but no one seems to have time to pick out a nice set for themselves. That's the recipe for the perfect gift. May I suggest Uniroyal Tiger Paws? They are uniform in color and pleasant to the eye. Moreover, the Tiger Paw is no longer made with actual tiger parts, a move which has made these tires both cheaper and less furry.
2) Sporks
People often ask me, "Professor Osler, how many sporks should I buy?" My answer, of course, is "how many can you afford?" The spork is the utensil of the future, so treat a loved one to a big drawerful of sporks. As budgets are strained, the silliness of buying both spoons AND forks will finally be revealed.
3) Gelatine
Did you know that gelatin is part of the "meat" food group? It's true, because it is made out of bone marrow. Now, it's not necessarily human bone marrow, but still...
4) Snow
It's fast, easy, and fun! Just wrap up some snow, put the package under the tree, and wait for the fun to begin!
Next: The secret to a great Christmas card!
1) Tires
Who doesn't love automobile tires? Everyone needs them, but no one seems to have time to pick out a nice set for themselves. That's the recipe for the perfect gift. May I suggest Uniroyal Tiger Paws? They are uniform in color and pleasant to the eye. Moreover, the Tiger Paw is no longer made with actual tiger parts, a move which has made these tires both cheaper and less furry.
2) Sporks
People often ask me, "Professor Osler, how many sporks should I buy?" My answer, of course, is "how many can you afford?" The spork is the utensil of the future, so treat a loved one to a big drawerful of sporks. As budgets are strained, the silliness of buying both spoons AND forks will finally be revealed.
3) Gelatine
Did you know that gelatin is part of the "meat" food group? It's true, because it is made out of bone marrow. Now, it's not necessarily human bone marrow, but still...
4) Snow
It's fast, easy, and fun! Just wrap up some snow, put the package under the tree, and wait for the fun to begin!
Next: The secret to a great Christmas card!
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Disappointed that some items are missing from this list.... Where is Broccoli Suit? Bacon of the Month Club? Flamethrower? Sporks are a nice touch though... Say it with Sporks.... I like it.
Wonderful gift suggestions Prof. Osler. I personally recommend the Tiger Paw Tires, even if I have to say I'm partial to the old version...fur does offer far superior traction. Ah, and if I may suggest, in the spirit of love-for-all Razor, agar-agar is the alternative to gelatin for vegetarian Razorites out there.
You can actually but sterling silver sporks in some patterns. Pefect gift for the WASP in your life.
MMM
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# posted by 
: 11:42 AM
: 11:42 AM
Anon... Get outta here...... seriously??? hahahaha Sterling Sporks for 12? Where were you when I was doing bridal registry?????
You are missing the "pet rock" of x-mas 2011 - the Whiskey Stones....
I need to get some of those sterling silver sporks. I can't believe there weren't any in Grandma Swanson's silver service.
I need to get some of those sterling silver sporks. I can't believe there weren't any in Grandma Swanson's silver service.
For those of you saying to yourselves, "I wish I could gift a spork this year, I'm just worried he/she will think I'm too cheap," please consider the following:
1) Snow Peak Titanium Spork
2) Light My Fire Spork (10 colors)
3) GSI Telescoping "Foon" (fork+spoon)
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1) Snow Peak Titanium Spork
2) Light My Fire Spork (10 colors)
3) GSI Telescoping "Foon" (fork+spoon)
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