Haiku winner: CTL!

Congratulations to CTL, this week's Haiku Friday winner! Here was his entry:

In a world where no
Shoe is safe, one dog stands for
Justice: G. Retriever.

And now his prize: A brief biography of CTL.

In a small town near Houston, CTL grew up in a family of Crypto-Baptists, a sect of the faith which holds that the mystery of God is so great that no real truth can be discerned, necessitating the rejection of anyone who believes in any doctrine whatsoever. As one might expect, this leads to a lot of schisms, and by the time CTL became a student at Baylor he had found a new and more coherent faith: Aqua Buddhism, and its one true prophet, Rand Paul.

At Baylor, CTL excelled at all that he did. As a part of Baylor's BIC program (which is sponsored by the BIC corporation and is devoted to good penmanship), CTL achieved near-perfect grades and the respect of his peers and professors. He also won the "Willie Nelson Fellowship," the "Brigid Eklund Award," and the "Rand Paul Bathing Area Prize," among others.

Most significantly, however, CTL was a whiz at finding incredible internships, including tours with the Department of Justice, the White House, Pickles the Evil Cat and her sidekick, IPLawGuy, and (currently) Dee Dee.

As he enters his senior year, all hail CTL!