Friday, November 21, 2008

 

Bad Music Haiku Friday


Yesterday, among many other things (and where else but the Razor can you find such articulate socialist v. capitalist shoot-outs?), we were discussing the relative merits of the Kinks vs. The Who. They're both good, so it was an excellent choice, but today let's look at the other side of the record.

There has been some truly horrendous music made. Some of it, in fact, is verrrry popular, too. So today's theme is bad music, which you can interpret either as music that is poorly played, mind-numbing, or just plain old annoying.

Here's mine:

Please go away, Zlad.
Don't wake up from your asleep,
Or, go bug Hoelscher.

Now it is your turn...

Comments:
Bay City Rollers,
Ode to Saturday night was
Awful terrible.
 
We're an American Band.
We'll come into your town.
We'll help you party down.
We're an American Band.

Does it get any worse than that?

Bob's Uncle Joe was
Afraid to cut the cake.
Let's go to Fire Lake.

Night they drove old
Dixie down. Night the Lights went
went out in Georgia.

Shannon is gone, She's
headed out to seeeeaaaaa. Billy
don't be a hero.

Anyone who thinks
there are worse songs than the ones
from the Seventies...

I would ask you to
spend Midnight at the Oasis
Sing your Camel to bed.

Or go ahead and
hate your neighbor. Hurt a friend. One tin soldier rides away.

I'd love to sing more,
but this Sweet City Woman
has never been to ME.

So I gotta go to bed.
 
PS: One more thing:
I AM woman. Hear me ROAR.
Its wisdom born of pain.
 
Half Breed. That's all I
Ever Heard. Knock Three Times on
ceiling if you think I'm Sexy.
 
ok Tyd, you are cracking me up this morning!!!!

Mrs. CL

(No Haiku for me yet, just woke up)
 
I wonder if Zlad
Has music that I downsplash
Plug plug in port your!
 
Eric Clapton, oof.
Pendentious malodorious
Poofter clodhopper.
 
RRL, he sings?
At Scruffy's in "Scrotundo"
Guitar battle with Lane?
 
Modern Country Music Haiku:

Fried chicken, daddy
Drinkin', baptizin', dancin',
BUCKY COVINGTON.

"Daddy let me drive"
(Vehicular Manslaughter),
Freakin' Alan J.

"Alcohol and Ass"
(Not kidding--that's a real song)
And then there's Miley...

Oh, and Rascall Flatts
All these songs sound the same, guys
Stop whining and leave

Willie and Dolly
Are rolling in their graves, and
They ain't even dead.
 
Tyd, Night the Drove Old
Dixie Down, you're saying was
a great song, I hope.

Scrotundo makes the
Razor! I've never been so
proud! Rocking Scruffys!

Someone left the cake
out in the rain. "Macarthur
Park" is the worst song.
 
Rebelling from the topic...
As the lone Kinks fan, I have to represent the more quintessentially British band...

Why not Come Dancing?
All day and all of the night,
You really got me.

Perhaps IPLAW
Feels some chagrin at the use,
Coke/Cola, Lola.
 
Hasn't anyone
told Gwen Stefani that she's
thirty-six years old?
 
worst muzak is hymns
like "Hail Thee, Festival Day"
in a Hallmark card
 
B is for Bastard!
"Hail Thee, Festival Day"
Best F-ing song EVER!
 
Have to Concede that
"Dixie Down" is no "The Night Chicago Died." Nah.

I wonder if "The Night the Lights Went out in Georgia" was the night all of you guys decided to apply for Law School. That song sure inspired me....

I think a lot of you owe Vicki Lawrence your careers.
 
Steely Dan's whole oevre
Stinky stinky suck pile bad
"Aja" is the worst.
 
Yes. I love it too, Anon. But not as muzak.
 
OK Tyd - you take the prize today. Truly inspiring!

Sheena Easton's, My
Baby Takes the Morning Train
~ My Dads favorite
 
Tyd...great haikus!
But, that song only inspired me to upgrade my pistol. I ain't no "backwoods southern lawyer" either, though...not in the bad sense of that phrase. :D

Okay, enough rebellion, here is my bad music/Barbie tie-in haiku:

Please, please make it stop,
"You get the best of both worlds!"
I will kill that doll.
 
Gwar, or Walter Zwol
Perhaps Hawkwind, or maybe
Spinal Tap, Part Two
 
Prof. Osler, I must
Disagree with your listing
Of the band Hawkwind.

Worst music, aside
From Nickelback and Kate Bush
Is all of pop music

A guitar battle
With RRL would be epic
I'll be Satan.

(Eat your heart out, Charlie Daniels.)
 
I have an article due yesterday that I am still working on and don't have time to write Haiku

(nor to read it....but... you know...)

Anyhow, for the first time ever I am going to agree with Lane:

Hawkind totally rules!

Of course, I know from bitter personal experience that the Prof's taste in music is suspect.

There's this guy he and I both know who has much better taste. Anytime you go on road trip with the Prof., be sure to ask him to get CDs from that guy.
 
For range, words, talent
Yes, its the Who. For humor,
Catchiness, the Kinks.

Drug addled weirdness
Orgon Accumulator,
Wizard stuff - Hawkwind

(OK, back to the Article for IPLAW360-- yes, its a real publication)
 
Fave Hawkwind lyric:
"Assault and Bat'ry of the
Human Anatomy"

OK, back to work. really. I mean it.
 
Coca Cola was
"Cherry Cola" on U.S.
version of single

Must.... Stop.... Must focus on Trademark Trial and Appeal Board precedent....
 
For pure addictive
hooks, it's the Kinks every time
baby. Talent? Yes!

Although I will concede that Behind Blue Eyes was pretty nice...I can't forgive them for Tommy. Sorry, guys.
 
Pinball wizard, yes!
Tina Turner, Acid Queen--
Where is the love, Ging?
 
Tommy is a great
Record. Movie not so much.
Who is best live band.

Guitar battle with
Lane! I will bring the Bud Light
And the tasty licks

RRL
 
Will Tyd just provide
The guitars to both of you?
I hear she has some.
 
Yeah we have a few guitars lying around.... Help yourself! Though some of them are charred....

The only reason I know all of these 70's songs is because one night when I was a YR about a hundred years ago we all sat around this one guy's house stuffing envelopes and we all tried to think of and sing every seventies song we could think of. It lasted for hours.

It was like a Bad Music Festival.
 
I can't believe it.
Unequivocal agree-
ment with RRL!

RE: "MacArthur Park"
As worst song ever;
Stupidest lyrics.
 
Ginger, I grew up
With backwoods Southern lawyers;
Partial to those words . . .

And not so backwoods:
Sam Ervin was from my town,
Morganton, NC.
 
Not haiku but was the song featured by Osler sampled in the Sugarhill Gang's "apache (jump on it)??????

Youtube both and tell me what you think...or am I just crazy?!
 
what what in the butt
I say what what in the butt
You wanna do it...?
 
Gwar is freakin' great
Song about animal sex
Written by aggie.
 
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