Monday, March 26, 2007

 

"The Single Worst Answer In The History of Practice Court"



The above picture is of some graffiti I found in Alpine. It was the only graffiti in Alpine, so I had to capture it. Oddly, it seems to combine the images of Prince and Michael Jackson. Somehow, despite their many similarities, they don't seem like they should be together.

Anyways, in a comment below, a PC student reveals that he gave "the single worst answer in the history of practice court." I kind of vaguely remember saying that, but I can't remember the context. If anyone can help out, please do.

I'm pretty sure that anonymous did not give the worst answer ever, anyways. The Single Worst Answer In the History of Practice Court was given by a guy playing the defendant in a criminal case. He was accused of killing the lover of his estranged wife in a fit of rage. The wife became estranged when she found him in bed with a woman described only as a "waitress from Hooter's." (I have often wondered about this stray fact-- how could the wife tell? Were there a pair of bright orange shorts by the bed?) The counsel for the defendant was questioning her client on the stand, leading to the following:

Q: When your wife came in, was anyone else in the room?
A: Yes.
Q: Who was that?
A: It was, you know, a waitress from Hooter's.
Q: Do you regret that?
A: Her working at Hooter's?
Q: No, having sex with her.
A: Oh, yeah, lots, there's a lot of regret there. A lot.
Q: What is it you regret?
A: [thoughtful pause] Well, of course, having sex with her at my house instead of at hers.

The all-female jury was not impressed.

Comments:
tuesday could bring more bad answers, pc I reading alone was over 20 cases and 170 pages, practice court is so awesome!
 
"Excelllllllennnnnt....." (said while whittling a stick to a sharp point and laughing maniacally).
 
How does Osler know what a pair of Hooter's shorts looks like?!! Bright orange?
 
What with Waco's recently built Hooter's Restaurant, how could he NOT know?
 
I've actually never been to Hooter's, but it's hard to miss the billboard!
 
oops, sorry . . . I guess I'm out of touch over here in la-la land . . . wonder if George W has been to Hooter's?
 
Wait a minute! Don't we as lawyers have an obligation to the truth? Sounds like the witness was telling the truth. He did indeed regret having sex with the Hooter's waitress at his own house. Wouldn't you?
 
Maybe, if the lawyer knew what the answer was, it would be more fair to say that it was the Single Worst Question in the History of Practice Court.
 
The Dr. Hugh Green case, on trial for allegedly using a 15 year old girl whom he possibly had a relationship with to falsify prescriptions to get drugs for him...

Q: What do you like to do in your free time?
A: Oh I don't know, you know just hang out, Relax.

Osler afterwards: "That was the single worst answer I have ever heard in Practice Court"
 
In the words of Mr. Garrison, "There are no stupid answers, just stupid people."
 
I read lots of complaints about practice court on this blog. But, it seems to me to be ripe for humor. The Hooters dialogue is great. Better than what SNL tries to pass as funny these days.
 
Speaking of funny, where's the Larry "Bud" Melman tribute? Doesn't the Razor have something to say about the great man's passing?
 
Oooh. Good point Mr. IPLG.
 
Osler,

I miss the telephone boy. The way that hamburger is smiling kind of creeps me out.

-B
 
Is thought this week was a double feature of "Bum Fights" and "Showgirls?" I must update my calender.
 
A dining establishment founded in 1983 in Clearwater, Florida will soon have the host of this blog as their new customer. Celebrity Luvr has the pleasure of introducing him to the culinary pleasures of this establishment on Friday. Our hope is to post a photo of the blog host with Hooter the Owl sometime in the near future. Will he go mild, medium, hot, 3 mile island, cajun or samurai? Please join us at 11:45 a.m. on Friday. All are welcome!! P.S. I just wanted to see how long this post would stay on the blog before it was deleted.
 
p.s. , swiss girl, when he visits, they call it "The Western Wing Stop" if you catch my drift.
 
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