Wednesday, January 17, 2007
The Three Keys to Driving in a "Wintry Mix"
Since I am not cancelling class, I at least owe my students some driving tips. In short, you should be fine if you remember three principles: Honesty, engagement, and humility.
1) Honesty
You need to accept that conditions are bad. That means, sadly that you can't go very fast. Just deal with it, and allow extra time.
2) Engagement
This is not the time to talk on a cell phone while you are driving, or do anything else distracting. This morning I saw a woman putting on eye makeup while piloting her giant SUV. Not good.
3) Humility
Gosh, what if someone else is going fast? Let them pass. It will not rob you of your honor to let them by. Probably you will catch up to them soon enough, as they rest against the tree they hit in their gigantic SUV while putting on eye makeup.
FAQs:
Question: I drive a gigantic SUV! Can't I go as fast as I usually go, since I have four wheel drive? Hold on a second, I have to put on my eye makeup...
Answer: The problem is that a giant SUV, even with 4WD, has longer braking distances than any other vehicle. You don't get in an accident because you weren't going fast enough, but because you can't stop soon enough, and you have the worst kind of vehicle for stopping.
Question: In Chicago, they would laugh at this. People would be running around in their bathing suits. You don't even need long pants for this.
Answer: All true.
Question: What is a "wintry mix?" I never heard of it before. Is it a new term for something we have always had, or is it actually a new substance?
Answer: In 2005, Starbucks featured "Wintry Mix" as a coffee-based treat which also contained caramel, cinnamon, granulated lard, and pumpkin spices. It did not sell well, and the Starbucks factory in Abilene produced nearly 500,000 tons that had to be stored in huge slurry ponds. This was disposed of as airborn pollution (in part to garner a tax credit Texas offers only to large-scale pollutors). This pollution served to "seed" the clouds over the Waco area, which are now raining down the said "wintry mix" over our area.
1) Honesty
You need to accept that conditions are bad. That means, sadly that you can't go very fast. Just deal with it, and allow extra time.
2) Engagement
This is not the time to talk on a cell phone while you are driving, or do anything else distracting. This morning I saw a woman putting on eye makeup while piloting her giant SUV. Not good.
3) Humility
Gosh, what if someone else is going fast? Let them pass. It will not rob you of your honor to let them by. Probably you will catch up to them soon enough, as they rest against the tree they hit in their gigantic SUV while putting on eye makeup.
FAQs:
Question: I drive a gigantic SUV! Can't I go as fast as I usually go, since I have four wheel drive? Hold on a second, I have to put on my eye makeup...
Answer: The problem is that a giant SUV, even with 4WD, has longer braking distances than any other vehicle. You don't get in an accident because you weren't going fast enough, but because you can't stop soon enough, and you have the worst kind of vehicle for stopping.
Question: In Chicago, they would laugh at this. People would be running around in their bathing suits. You don't even need long pants for this.
Answer: All true.
Question: What is a "wintry mix?" I never heard of it before. Is it a new term for something we have always had, or is it actually a new substance?
Answer: In 2005, Starbucks featured "Wintry Mix" as a coffee-based treat which also contained caramel, cinnamon, granulated lard, and pumpkin spices. It did not sell well, and the Starbucks factory in Abilene produced nearly 500,000 tons that had to be stored in huge slurry ponds. This was disposed of as airborn pollution (in part to garner a tax credit Texas offers only to large-scale pollutors). This pollution served to "seed" the clouds over the Waco area, which are now raining down the said "wintry mix" over our area.
Comments:
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Two Questions: I'm concerned because the Starbucks on Bosque closed early the other day due to fear of impending "wintery mix" fall. The sky was getting dark! (of course, it was a little after 5 PM) Anyhow, I have become so used to having Baristas make my coffee that I forgot the recipe.
How should I prepare for possible caffeine deprivation?
And how am I supposed to work if I'm not surrounded by chatting students and coffee shop customers?
How should I prepare for possible caffeine deprivation?
And how am I supposed to work if I'm not surrounded by chatting students and coffee shop customers?
# posted by 
: 11:37 AM
: 11:37 AM
IPLG--
I think it is time for you to become a law professor.
As for Starbucks, they close when their products are falling from the sky, for obvious reasons.
One thing, though-- be careful to wash your car immediately if any of Starbucks Wintry Mix gets on it, since it can really damage the paint.
I think it is time for you to become a law professor.
As for Starbucks, they close when their products are falling from the sky, for obvious reasons.
One thing, though-- be careful to wash your car immediately if any of Starbucks Wintry Mix gets on it, since it can really damage the paint.
You failed to warn of the dangers associated with driving with your head out the window.
It's a poor substitute for de-icing the windshield.
It's a poor substitute for de-icing the windshield.
# posted by : 12:50 PM
: 12:50 PM
Swanburg,
Contact me for a free consultation. I'm not the Texas hammer, but I'll go after Osler for every dime you deserve.
-B
Contact me for a free consultation. I'm not the Texas hammer, but I'll go after Osler for every dime you deserve.
-B
# posted by : 1:23 PM
: 1:23 PM
It wasn't MY car that I was driving in CenTex. But your explanation accounts for the bashed in quarter panels. At least that's my story if the owner asks.
# posted by : 1:59 PM
: 1:59 PM
I was well aware of the danger of driving with my head out the window, but being the dedicated law student I am I did not want to be late for class. Of course if I was as smart as I am dedicated I would have checked my email and known that class was canceled.
Luckily for me there were no cops along my route and I made it to school in one piece, even though I had to drive 5 miles an hour.
Luckily for me there were no cops along my route and I made it to school in one piece, even though I had to drive 5 miles an hour.
# posted by : 4:21 PM
: 4:21 PM
I'd rather snow instead of sleet. People at least realize they need to go slow in the snow, and then the highway officials can just move the snow to the side. Sleet just ices everything over. You can't see the ice spots, and its impossible to get off the roads and your car.
Sleet is far worse than snow. It is the worst weather on the planet (short catastrophes like hurricanes, tornadoes, and blizzards). Snow is fun. Sleet sucks.
Sleet is far worse than snow. It is the worst weather on the planet (short catastrophes like hurricanes, tornadoes, and blizzards). Snow is fun. Sleet sucks.
# posted by : 5:34 PM
: 5:34 PM
Sadly Nina, although you were the only one I saw with your head out the window, you are not the only student to admit to such a driving aberration. Although. . . you're probably the only one from Ohio.
# posted by : 5:35 PM
: 5:35 PM
Oh my gosh! More wintery mix is on the way for the weekend. Will this apocalyptic weather never end? Is this an indication of the second coming? I've got Pat Robertson on speed-dial, maybe he knows.
Note on caffeine deprivation for IPLG: open a can of Folgers and chew a teaspoon of grounds. Skip the coffeemaker entirely. Works every time.
Note on caffeine deprivation for IPLG: open a can of Folgers and chew a teaspoon of grounds. Skip the coffeemaker entirely. Works every time.
# posted by : 11:16 PM
: 11:16 PM
Hah, we're supposed to get our OWN Wintry mix here in the DC area tomorrow. Only it will be white and fluffy and we'll call it snow.
Although I've been disappointed before by mere freezing rain. Which, as others have pointed out, is really the worst kind of weather of all time.
Although I've been disappointed before by mere freezing rain. Which, as others have pointed out, is really the worst kind of weather of all time.
# posted by : 11:59 PM
: 11:59 PM
My poor sad car wouldn't de-ice for a while in a bunch of places. I had to drive to a doctor's appointment (crap for health doesn't wait for good weather, and docs are always willing to take my cash, GRR) with iced-over rearview mirrors, ice covering all the windowa and a good half my windshield, and a stupid emergency box that my parents packed that didn't include a darn ice scraper.
It's like they thought I was going to college in Texas or something! No ice scraper? WTF?!
It's like they thought I was going to college in Texas or something! No ice scraper? WTF?!
Osler,
Since I went to undergrad at Abilene Christian, I lost a number of good friends in the dreaded "wintry mix" ponds.
It was like a scene from Willy Wonka. They would smell the delicious aroma, get too close, and then they were just gone.
You've really touched a sensitive nerve here.
Since I went to undergrad at Abilene Christian, I lost a number of good friends in the dreaded "wintry mix" ponds.
It was like a scene from Willy Wonka. They would smell the delicious aroma, get too close, and then they were just gone.
You've really touched a sensitive nerve here.
# posted by : 7:47 AM
: 7:47 AM
ARE WINTRY MIX and SLEET the same as FREEZING RAIN??
I once had to drive from Grosse Pointe to Ann Arbor, MI in freezing rain. I was told that no matter what, the event was taking place, and it did. However, then it closed ten minutes after I got there.
Then, back in the parking lot, I had to defrost my car. I started in the front driver side and turned on the motor so the heater would help, and worked my way around the car, chipping away with a scraper the almost half inch layer of ice covering my car.
Then, when I got back to where I had started chipping, it had gotten all covered again. I had to start over. FINALLY I was on my way. However the freeway was a disaster. IT took me 4 hours to get home, and I had only an AM radio in my crappy car. This was the night that Nancy Kerrigan had been clubbed in Detroit, and that night everyone thought it was someone from Detroit who had done it. SO alllll the way home I had AM DJs blasting about how the city has gone to hell, and how could anyone club Nancy Kerrigan and blah blah
It was a magic night.
AS I sit in my house in Oregon doing my 34th load of laundry (this time I threw the dog in - hey - he was sitting still - he asked for it), "trapped" here by the three inches of snow that fell Monday night, with the schools closed for the THIRD DAY, I wonder how anyone lives to age 20 in Michigan.
My 2 year old, Spencer, however, loves it.
I once had to drive from Grosse Pointe to Ann Arbor, MI in freezing rain. I was told that no matter what, the event was taking place, and it did. However, then it closed ten minutes after I got there.
Then, back in the parking lot, I had to defrost my car. I started in the front driver side and turned on the motor so the heater would help, and worked my way around the car, chipping away with a scraper the almost half inch layer of ice covering my car.
Then, when I got back to where I had started chipping, it had gotten all covered again. I had to start over. FINALLY I was on my way. However the freeway was a disaster. IT took me 4 hours to get home, and I had only an AM radio in my crappy car. This was the night that Nancy Kerrigan had been clubbed in Detroit, and that night everyone thought it was someone from Detroit who had done it. SO alllll the way home I had AM DJs blasting about how the city has gone to hell, and how could anyone club Nancy Kerrigan and blah blah
It was a magic night.
AS I sit in my house in Oregon doing my 34th load of laundry (this time I threw the dog in - hey - he was sitting still - he asked for it), "trapped" here by the three inches of snow that fell Monday night, with the schools closed for the THIRD DAY, I wonder how anyone lives to age 20 in Michigan.
My 2 year old, Spencer, however, loves it.
# posted by : 11:09 AM
: 11:09 AM
OSLER:
HOW could you drive IPLAW to the airport in a car with a broken cupholder?
Have you no sense of decency? I think he needs to MOVE TO WACO, teach Law at Baylor and make your life miserable by beating you at Scrabble and Foosball every day for the rest of your tenured, natural life.
HOW could you drive IPLAW to the airport in a car with a broken cupholder?
Have you no sense of decency? I think he needs to MOVE TO WACO, teach Law at Baylor and make your life miserable by beating you at Scrabble and Foosball every day for the rest of your tenured, natural life.
# posted by : 11:13 AM
: 11:13 AM
Tyd--
Last night I beat Bates at Scrabble, so I'm on a roll. And I didn't drive IPLG to the airport; he stole my car.
Also, I clubbed Nancy Kerrigan. And, boy was Tanya Harding grateful! She's from Oregon, too, you know.
Last night I beat Bates at Scrabble, so I'm on a roll. And I didn't drive IPLG to the airport; he stole my car.
Also, I clubbed Nancy Kerrigan. And, boy was Tanya Harding grateful! She's from Oregon, too, you know.
Wow, the wintry mix must have gotten to you. You're confessing one crime and accusing me of another. This, on top of attempting to create new words in Scrabble.
Have you become another of those former prosecutors who flirts with the dark side of the law?
Have you become another of those former prosecutors who flirts with the dark side of the law?
# posted by : 4:34 PM
: 4:34 PM
Darn you, OSLER - Trying to sabotage Nancy Kerrigan so that she could not skate and thus lose the Olympics and then NOT be eligible to be in a parade at Disney World that she makes fun of when she thinks no one is listening, but her mic was left on.
There are two kinds of people in this world. Nancy people and Tonya people.
You cannot HAIKU your way out of this one, pal. I always knew you were a Tonya.
AND Iplaw stole you car??? That nice, upstanding, innocent young man from the East Coast? First you are a Foosball Shark, then you move on to Innocent Scrabble players.....
You give Zombies a bad name.
There are two kinds of people in this world. Nancy people and Tonya people.
You cannot HAIKU your way out of this one, pal. I always knew you were a Tonya.
AND Iplaw stole you car??? That nice, upstanding, innocent young man from the East Coast? First you are a Foosball Shark, then you move on to Innocent Scrabble players.....
You give Zombies a bad name.
# posted by : 4:22 AM
: 4:22 AM
P.S.
I KNOW Tonya lives here. Why do you think I moved here? So I can buy my lawnmower parts from the Sears that is next to the Clackamas Town Center Mall that houses the hallowed ground on which she practiced.
HEy Here is a question for the ages.... and probably the reason I never did got to Law School - Tonya to this day STILL INSISTS that she had NOTHING to do with the Kerrigan affair. THey found notes about it in her handwriting, they have all of these guys that testified that she was totally in on it... Yet, she STILL insists to this day that she had nothing to do with it.
Its like OJ.... OF COURSE he did it, everyone knows this there was evidence AND he got off so why not now just say "OK I did it." I mean how can criminals like just KEEP LYING for so long????? ANd how do they EVER find lawyers to help them???
I do not get it.
I KNOW Tonya lives here. Why do you think I moved here? So I can buy my lawnmower parts from the Sears that is next to the Clackamas Town Center Mall that houses the hallowed ground on which she practiced.
HEy Here is a question for the ages.... and probably the reason I never did got to Law School - Tonya to this day STILL INSISTS that she had NOTHING to do with the Kerrigan affair. THey found notes about it in her handwriting, they have all of these guys that testified that she was totally in on it... Yet, she STILL insists to this day that she had nothing to do with it.
Its like OJ.... OF COURSE he did it, everyone knows this there was evidence AND he got off so why not now just say "OK I did it." I mean how can criminals like just KEEP LYING for so long????? ANd how do they EVER find lawyers to help them???
I do not get it.
# posted by : 4:29 AM
: 4:29 AM
Tyd--
Well, we kind of did it "for" Tanya, out of love for her, rather than at her direction, really. For the record, I was the really fat, uncoordinated guy in the plot.
Well, we kind of did it "for" Tanya, out of love for her, rather than at her direction, really. For the record, I was the really fat, uncoordinated guy in the plot.
You mean the "ex Navy Seal that was still under super secret special contract with the CIA?" That Sean guy who was convinced that after the attck he and his buddies would make a lot of money providing bodyguard protection for all of the other skaters that were also scared they would be Whacked?
What a tool that guy was.... I KNOW that was not you. Hey are you.....? Are you secretly leading a double life?? Could YOu TONYA HERSELF???? If I could I would tug that Osler Mask off of your head (like in that one horrible Tom Cruise Movie) and reveal your true identity.... But... Nice job on the triple axel though. You were REALLLY a good skater. Too bad your costumes always looked so slutty.
What a tool that guy was.... I KNOW that was not you. Hey are you.....? Are you secretly leading a double life?? Could YOu TONYA HERSELF???? If I could I would tug that Osler Mask off of your head (like in that one horrible Tom Cruise Movie) and reveal your true identity.... But... Nice job on the triple axel though. You were REALLLY a good skater. Too bad your costumes always looked so slutty.
# posted by : 2:49 PM
: 2:49 PM
I LIKED the costumes. Let's face it, Nancy Kerrigan had the sex appeal of a lead pipe.
But what with this latest disclosure, I'm a little grossed out.
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But what with this latest disclosure, I'm a little grossed out.
# posted by : 2:16 PM
: 2:16 PM << Home
