Sunday, January 07, 2007
Perhaps I should have not asked at all...
Like many people in Central Texas, I have many times driven past the "Bible Factory Outlet" in Hillsboro. The idea has always intrigued me. I'm someone who actually bought three Bibles in the last year, some as gifts, so I'm not adverse to merchandising the good book.
However, the "Bible Factory Outlet" does raise some questions. Do Bibles really come from a "Bible Factory?" Somehow, I imagined something more dignified than a big smokestack-topped building in Cleveland. Do other books come from a "factory?" Hmmm. Even more intriguing, though, was the idea of a Bible outlet store. Such stores usually have two types of goods: overstocks and factory seconds. I'm not sure how that works; you could have overstocks of certain kinds of translations perhaps... ie, "Florence, we're not moving the King James! Send them to the outlet mall!"
But what I really wanted to know about was factory second Bibles. Would certain books be missing? Or, even better, would it be full of typos? I kind of wanted a Bible with horrible typos, so I stopped by the Bible Factory Outlet to ask.
In short, they don't have factory seconds, and it seems like they are maybe a little tired of hearing people ask about that. And if you really press the issue, boy, do they get annoyed!
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They also don't like it when you say,
"Why the hell would I buy this when I could just as easily steal it from any motel in the country."
"Why the hell would I buy this when I could just as easily steal it from any motel in the country."
# posted by 
: 7:50 PM
: 7:50 PM
Speaking of typos, I sat through a sermon on New Year's Eve which used the KJV I Sam. 27:10 "Wither have you laid a road today?" (or something similar, I can't recall off the top of my head) as the text in the context of what "roads" we should create in the new year. You can imagine my mother's and my perplexity when our NIV and NKJV read "raid" in place of "road" in the KJV. The use of "road" in the context of I Sam. 27 was completely out of place. What else was odd was that the use of the scripture made no sense whatsoever in the context of his sermon outside of the one quoted question.
# posted by : 8:11 PM
: 8:11 PM
Swanburg--
I've always wondered if you were supposed to take those Bibles or not. I once knew a guy who was a Gideon, and I forgot to ask him.
By the way, about your Mom dating Meatloaf... what would one do on a date with Meatloaf? I mean, do you go to a movie? Or is it more of a Monster Truck Show thing? Though I have danced with two famous people, I never dated any of them. (And I have no interest in Meatloaf. Well, actually, sometimes I have a lot of interest in meatloaf, but that's different).
I've always wondered if you were supposed to take those Bibles or not. I once knew a guy who was a Gideon, and I forgot to ask him.
By the way, about your Mom dating Meatloaf... what would one do on a date with Meatloaf? I mean, do you go to a movie? Or is it more of a Monster Truck Show thing? Though I have danced with two famous people, I never dated any of them. (And I have no interest in Meatloaf. Well, actually, sometimes I have a lot of interest in meatloaf, but that's different).
Stopping a parade in front of Linda Lavin does not constitute dancing with her. And playing football with Al Franken isn't the same as dancing with him either.
# posted by : 9:32 PM
: 9:32 PM
A date with Meatloaf would probably involve a lot of listening to him moan about how his career tanked after the Bat Out of Hell album and how his manager screwed him over, etc. etc.
As for the Bible outlet, here's a fun fact: One of Nevada's (yes Nevada) during the 50's and 60's was named Alan Bible.
Maybe the store is named after a Mr. Bible
As for the Bible outlet, here's a fun fact: One of Nevada's (yes Nevada) during the 50's and 60's was named Alan Bible.
Maybe the store is named after a Mr. Bible
# posted by : 10:06 PM
: 10:06 PM
To fill in the missing word in IPLG's comment-- Alan Bible was a Nevada Senator. He was not a state named Nevada, nor was he literally a bible. I looked it up.
IPLG-- where do you want to have your party while you are here?
IPLG-- where do you want to have your party while you are here?
I own and use on a regular basis six different Bibles--four in English (but not King James!) and two in Spanish (Jesus really rocks when speaking Castilian), but I have never bought a Bible for myself. All have been gifts. I wonder what that says about me?
# posted by : 11:38 PM
: 11:38 PM
OK, I am a sloppy typist. I think faster than my fingers work.
As previously mentioned on the Razor, I am a horrible foosball player. I lack basic hand/eye coordination
Anyplace other than the Masonic Hall is fine. That place did not work out so well for at least a few people last time.
As previously mentioned on the Razor, I am a horrible foosball player. I lack basic hand/eye coordination
Anyplace other than the Masonic Hall is fine. That place did not work out so well for at least a few people last time.
# posted by : 11:57 PM
: 11:57 PM
That's not the only blog fodder on the stretch of 35 between Waco and Dallas. Dont' forget the Monolithic Dome Institute, Carl's Corner, the Pecan Bowl Outlet (or whatever the hell it's called; a little north of West?) that consists of nothing but a sign. Go a little further north near Waxahatchie, and there's a place that sells chainsaw art (bears and such).
Whoa. I can't believe that I'm old enough to know who Linda Lavin even IS. So when did Osler stop a parade in front of "Alice"... and why? Inquiring minds want to know.
# posted by : 9:58 AM
: 9:58 AM
From what I gather it was back in the late 60's, early 70's and umm. . . I'm guessing their relationship resembled a scene from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.
But I may be wrong. I don't think I'm wrong but its entirely possible.
I'll leave it up to my mother to fill in the details.
But I may be wrong. I don't think I'm wrong but its entirely possible.
I'll leave it up to my mother to fill in the details.
# posted by : 1:15 PM
: 1:15 PM
I had a date or 2 with Meatloaf in the early 70's. The dates were very simple - a limo picked me up from Long Island and took me to a recording studio in Manhattan. We talked, he worked, I listened we went out with a group of people for food and drinks. The limo took me back to Long Island. Swanburg's version is much more exciting. Sex, drugs and Rock n' Roll. Our dates missed one or more of the important components.
Swanburg's Mom9
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# posted by : 5:35 PM
: 5:35 PM << Home
