Osler's Razor

For nearly 100 years, the Chicago Cubs frustrated and angered their fans. Then, one brilliant fall day in 2003, the fans returned the favor. That's the legend of Steve Bartman... but we'll get to him in a minute.

Back in my college radio days, one of my jobs was to record short "station ID" messages that would play at the top of the hour. The task was just to give the call letters and frequency, but I liked to add a little oomph to it. My favorite series was the distant brush with fame" series, which included the two ID's:

1) "My name is Janet Kirkley, and my dad once almost got run over by Vincent Price in a parking lot. When I'm in Williamsburg, I make sure to listen to listen to WCWM-FM, 90.7 FM!"

2) "Hi, I'm Rick Box. I worked in a restaurant that Steve Martin ate at once, but I wasn't there then. One thing I am always there for, though, is WCWM-FM, 90.7 in Williamsburg!"

My personal brushes with fame have been pretty slight-- Jack White of the White Stripes upholstered my couch, for example, and I bought Ted Nugent's end table at his garage sale in Waco.

Still, I am wowed by friends that have more concrete brushes with fame, so I was floored this week to learn that my friend and colleague at St. Thomas, Ben Carpenter, was Steve Bartman's roommate at Notre Dame. Seriously! He even sent me this photo to prove it (which includes Ben, Bartman, and former William and Mary coach Lou Holtz):


What?!?! Some of you don't know who Steve Bartman is? Sheesh... well, long story short, in 2003 (according to Cubs lore) Bartman single-handedly stopped the Cubs from reaching the World Series for the first time since 1908 by grabbing a foul ball right out of the hands of an eager Cub who was about to wrap things up. To make it better, he was inexplicably wearing walkman headphones over his Cubs hat at the time. Here's a video:



So, let's haiku about brushes with fame. It doesn't have to be a close brush, of course. Here is mine:

That guy on the bus
With me, kinda familiar:
It's Nipsy Russell!

[Note: This isn't even my own experience-- it happened to Rich Sullivan in college]

Now, it is your turn. Five syllables for the first line, seven for the second, then five for the last... or you can make it about Bartman, in which case it can be any old mess you want.