Friday, August 17, 2007
A New Year, a New Haiku Friday!
I missed haiku Friday. I'll be honest-- I made up a few even when I was unable to access the internet. Here are this week's suggested (but not mandatory) themes:
1) Elaine from Seinfeld
2) Buying textbooks
3) The weird emotional last-day walkout
4) The outhouse
5) The end of summer
6) Baylor Football
7) Barry Bonds
8) Rerun from "What's Happening"
9) Jimmy Walker in 2007
10) Mr. CL, Househusband
Here is mine:
Get Out! she yelled
Pushing Kramer with both hands;
1991.
Comments:
<< Home
You know, Osler we HAD Haiku Friday when you were gone... in your honor. Last week when we still all thought you were in Cuba... on my Fake "BLOG WHILE OSLER IS GONE" called "Boogie Ate Donut."
It was because we missed you. ANYWAY we made the rule that the judges would be the winners fromt he previous week.... and since Swiss Girl picked these two.. I was wondering if THEY could judge the winners on your blog this week only? SwissGirl picked IPLAW and Ginger Hunter.
Swissgirl said...
Okay, my winners are:
IPLawguy for the corniest joke. I mean, that mathematician joke is so bad it's hardly even there!
And for best haiku, I've gotta give it to Ginger Hunter for that image of Osler behind Ray-Bans in smoky Cuba. I imagine music in the background, and a big faded 2-tone Chevy convertible driving by . . . anyway, congratulations!
You don't HAVE to do it, but we DID all miss you a LOT.
My haiku for this week:
Spencer got his cast.
Osler's back. Dog ate phone cord.
Back to normal now.
Now if only I
could find out what corn cannon
is, that would be good.
Thanks to all of you
who read my fake blog. Thank good-
ness he is back now.
It was because we missed you. ANYWAY we made the rule that the judges would be the winners fromt he previous week.... and since Swiss Girl picked these two.. I was wondering if THEY could judge the winners on your blog this week only? SwissGirl picked IPLAW and Ginger Hunter.
Swissgirl said...
Okay, my winners are:
IPLawguy for the corniest joke. I mean, that mathematician joke is so bad it's hardly even there!
And for best haiku, I've gotta give it to Ginger Hunter for that image of Osler behind Ray-Bans in smoky Cuba. I imagine music in the background, and a big faded 2-tone Chevy convertible driving by . . . anyway, congratulations!
You don't HAVE to do it, but we DID all miss you a LOT.
My haiku for this week:
Spencer got his cast.
Osler's back. Dog ate phone cord.
Back to normal now.
Now if only I
could find out what corn cannon
is, that would be good.
Thanks to all of you
who read my fake blog. Thank good-
ness he is back now.
Must have corn cannon
Could be like potato gun
Blasting vegtables!
Up too late again
Plans for morning run on shelf
I am getting fat
My judging will be limited to corny jokes, thank you. So include a corny joke if you want me to sit in judgment.
Here's mine:
What's worse than a worm in an ear of corn? (or apple)
Half a worm!
Could be like potato gun
Blasting vegtables!
Up too late again
Plans for morning run on shelf
I am getting fat
My judging will be limited to corny jokes, thank you. So include a corny joke if you want me to sit in judgment.
Here's mine:
What's worse than a worm in an ear of corn? (or apple)
Half a worm!
# posted by 
: 1:20 AM
: 1:20 AM
Oh yes, on topic:
Despite Barry Bonds
the Giants stink. Even so,
they have Jon Miller
Despite Barry Bonds
the Giants stink. Even so,
they have Jon Miller
# posted by : 1:22 AM
: 1:22 AM
IPLG, you know my comment about your corniest joke was a COMPLIMENT! And you write good haiku, too. The judging thing--is so arbitrary, you know?
# posted by : 8:13 AM
: 8:13 AM
Last day of summer
Means there's a first day of school;
My first week's okay--
Swiss-style: barbecue
Outdoors, for Friday lunch, with
Bratwurst, meats, wine, beer.
Not so bad, huh? Now
I'm post-lunch, cramming coffee,
What's my job, again?
Means there's a first day of school;
My first week's okay--
Swiss-style: barbecue
Outdoors, for Friday lunch, with
Bratwurst, meats, wine, beer.
Not so bad, huh? Now
I'm post-lunch, cramming coffee,
What's my job, again?
# posted by : 8:15 AM
: 8:15 AM
Corny jokes, bad puns
weak similes, metaphors
Word play makes me laugh
SG, I took it as compliment! Thanks
So where's your corny joke?
weak similes, metaphors
Word play makes me laugh
SG, I took it as compliment! Thanks
So where's your corny joke?
# posted by : 9:24 AM
: 9:24 AM
Okay, my corny joke: How many Swiss does it take to change a light bulb?
One to clean the socket, one to direct the bulb-screwer to turn the bulb CLOCKWISE, one to hold the ladder, one to screw in the bulb, and one to make sure that no one makes any NOISE while the bulb is being screwed in. And then you'll need an exact replica of those 5 people to do the exact same thing on another bulb, because they ALWAYS have a backup.
Ahem. I made that one up. I only know like one joke and I've already told it twice.
One to clean the socket, one to direct the bulb-screwer to turn the bulb CLOCKWISE, one to hold the ladder, one to screw in the bulb, and one to make sure that no one makes any NOISE while the bulb is being screwed in. And then you'll need an exact replica of those 5 people to do the exact same thing on another bulb, because they ALWAYS have a backup.
Ahem. I made that one up. I only know like one joke and I've already told it twice.
# posted by : 10:45 AM
: 10:45 AM
Here's my corny joke:
How many UVA students does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but she gets three credits.
How many UVA students does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but she gets three credits.
Actually, it takes two UVa students to change a lightbulb. Someone has to hold the drinks
# posted by : 11:29 AM
: 11:29 AM
ok and by the way?/ I NEVER DID GET that Mathematician joke...
Here it is.. see if YOU get it.. I TOTALLY don't:
OK it was not the Math one I got that one... it was this one
What do you get when you cross Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and a Chihuahua?
-- a Flying Carpet.
Here it is.. see if YOU get it.. I TOTALLY don't:
OK it was not the Math one I got that one... it was this one
What do you get when you cross Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and a Chihuahua?
-- a Flying Carpet.
Tyd, tyd, tyd...the joke is so simple yet so eloquent.
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang was a flying car. Remember Dick Van Dyke and his fading in and out fake British accent? A chihuahua is a dog, a pet to some (like Paris Hilton). Cross the two and you get a flying carpet.
Ha! I slay me.
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang was a flying car. Remember Dick Van Dyke and his fading in and out fake British accent? A chihuahua is a dog, a pet to some (like Paris Hilton). Cross the two and you get a flying carpet.
Ha! I slay me.
# posted by : 4:15 PM
: 4:15 PM
About the joke I did not get it because I did not link the word PET with the dog.... CAR PET.. DUH.
HA!! Well I KNOW that movie... Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. When I saw it as a kid I remember it well because it scared me to death. I had nightmares for WEEKS about being locked in the jail But then BAMBI is too scary for me. Among other movies that scared me as a kid:
The Sound of Music: I was forever hiding "from the Nazis" behind the couch in the livingroom after seeing it
The Wizard of Oz: EVERY YEAR when it was on at Easter y mom would tell me I could not watch it because I would get scared of the flying monkeys and I would always say NO this year I will not be scared. And then of course I was then I would not sleep for weeks. This happened every year, until I was 29.
The same can be said for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Oddly though I saw Apocalypse Now when I was eight and the only thing I remember form it was when they cut the head off a cow. Still not as scary as the flying monkeys.
HA!! Well I KNOW that movie... Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. When I saw it as a kid I remember it well because it scared me to death. I had nightmares for WEEKS about being locked in the jail But then BAMBI is too scary for me. Among other movies that scared me as a kid:
The Sound of Music: I was forever hiding "from the Nazis" behind the couch in the livingroom after seeing it
The Wizard of Oz: EVERY YEAR when it was on at Easter y mom would tell me I could not watch it because I would get scared of the flying monkeys and I would always say NO this year I will not be scared. And then of course I was then I would not sleep for weeks. This happened every year, until I was 29.
The same can be said for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Oddly though I saw Apocalypse Now when I was eight and the only thing I remember form it was when they cut the head off a cow. Still not as scary as the flying monkeys.
My half brother's wife
is pregnant. He has no clue
what he is in for....
I look forward to
giving him LOTS of ADVICE
Just like he gave me.
Here is the first one:
Hide your Palm Pilot, give up
on a clean kitchen.
He always says I
must be exaggerating.
Nope. Not once. You'll see.
is pregnant. He has no clue
what he is in for....
I look forward to
giving him LOTS of ADVICE
Just like he gave me.
Here is the first one:
Hide your Palm Pilot, give up
on a clean kitchen.
He always says I
must be exaggerating.
Nope. Not once. You'll see.
better late than never
Jerky contortions
limbs flying,thumbs extended
Dance...cry,cry again
plethora of puns
pounding, in rapid fire
the victims fall but,
not doubled over
by semi-automatic
Corny cannon rounds
Post a Comment
Jerky contortions
limbs flying,thumbs extended
Dance...cry,cry again
plethora of puns
pounding, in rapid fire
the victims fall but,
not doubled over
by semi-automatic
Corny cannon rounds
# posted by : 8:58 PM
: 8:58 PM << Home
